It's most likely been about two months (at least) since you heard your first complaint about Christmas decorations being put up in shop windows. However now that we're well into December, it is finally justifiable to even mention the Silly Season here.
Unfortunately, accompanying those decorations strewn around malls and shops is often the most hideous pandemonium of Christmas music you are ever likely to hear. If it's not the cheesy pop hits of the past 30 years, or updated and cringe-worthy upbeat versions of already terrible carols, it's unexpected and strange duets (I'm looking at you David Bowie & Bing Crosby and Bruce Springsteen & Bon Jovi). Admittedly some of the old classics are just that, classic. It's difficult not to feel festive when you hear Bing Crosby begin to croon some festive songs (aside perhaps from the aforementioned Bowie duet), or enjoy Nat King Cole singing The Christmas Song and to a depressingly lesser extent The Little Boy That Santa Claus Forgot.
However, for every great Yuletide song you can hear each year, there is a fountain, nay a mountain of turgid shit that pollutes the airwaves and CD stands. But this does not mean that lovers of good music must shut their windows and close their doors, unable to take part in the holiday season with good festive songs. There are plenty of tracks, some even within the last few years, that put their own spin on Christmas and happen to actually be great to listen to.
Beginning with something mildly epic, the Trans Siberian Orchestra's version of Carol of the Bells brings the 100 year Ukrainian chant some well deserved rawk. If when Carol of the Bells is mentioned you even dare think about listening to Destiny's Child annihilation of the tune, stop and let the metal maestros blow you away with their complex and stadium-sized rendition of the chilly Winter's tale (except that it's actually originally about Spring). If you'd prefer to go old school, then you can't much go past RUN DMC's Christmas In Hollis. Or better yet, the Christmas tune that RUN DMC samples for Hollis is Clarence Carter's Back Door Santa; the funky (and exceptionally seedy) soul number.
Tim Minchin: Knows what's important at Christmas.
For something more comical but with an undercurrent of serious thought, Tom Lehrer's A Christmas Carol is one of the only honest Christmas songs ever written. Lehrer explains in just a few minutes exactly what the true meaning of Christmas really is; money. All the more startling, and somewhat depressing then to note that it was composed in the 50s. But infinitely more beautiful than Lehrer's leering and snarling American accent, is Tim Minchin's lilting and heartfelt White Wine In The Sun. It sums up perfectly what it is like to be secular at Christmas, and slightly bemused by all the religiosity that surrounds the holidays. After money, family is of course the most important thing at Christmas, and Minchin's ode to his daughter really is a touching tale of how she will always find her family's love and security, no matter how overwhelming life gets.
For something altogether more alternative arranged on one very handy little compilation, you can't go much past Just Say Noël. Featuring tracks by the likes of everyone from Beck to an excellent track from XTC to possibly the best version of Amazing Grace by Ted Hawkins, it is the most eclectic collection of Christmas songs you're likely to find.
There are many other great Christmas songs that I could have included on this distinctly incomprehensive list, but that is part of the fun of tracking down some festive musicality. The hunt through the crap to find the kernels of greatness is what it's all about. Of course, I could just be keeping some under wraps so I have something to talk about this time next year. Merry Christmas.
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